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Yesterday was a bit rough for me as I had to deal with the answer that I didn't want to have to deal with. I gave the highers the day off and sulked. Today I decided to continue to move forward. It has been decent today.

I may have gotten an answer I didn't want to have but maybe it was time to get it. I will always be thankful and grateful for my time I shared with her. I wish her only the very best life has to offer.

Still trying to see the value in me and I know its there. One step forward two steps back but hey I'm moving. Now I go forward again. I will never loose as long as I continue to do my best.

I have to start thinking about things I am passionate about and I really don't know. I mean there are some things I enjoy but I don't know if I have a real passion for anything. Guess its time I explore.

I still am working on the loving me and a wise woman told me to just start with liking me and work from there. Again I have no clue as to where I am heading but I am heading there. I know what I desire and while I may not have those yet I know I will get them.

Dealing with my issues is a task and sometimes we just need that one day. When I woke up today I didn't hate life. I did yesterday but not today. I was grateful to be and its paid off. Moving forward is a very hard thing to do but a very necessary thing if I am going to be a better me.

I believe in me. While I may not know how or when or why I do know that for 46 years I have made it. So maybe I don't need the answers right now. Just need to have faith.

Its hard to believe in myself from all the years of not wanting my own self. Now I am learning to want me. I am not perfect nor will I ever be but I am real and I am determined to not give up.

Things have never come easy to me but it does help to appreciate them more. Still am learning to be grateful for everything. Now to just keep plugging at it.